MOVIE REVIEW: Godzilla - King Of The Monsters
(Godzilla - Blue Oyster Cult)
At their core, the 'Golden Age' Toho Godzilla films were a warning against the research and use of nuclear power. The giant lizard was a metaphor for the perils we were courting should such endeavors go wrong. Humanity was the real monster.
As time passed, moves stopped being so direct with their comparisons and started being more about watching a giant monster wreck whatever was unfortunate enough to wind up in the same timezone. And it was good.
The greatest of these giant monster movies that we've seen in the last 20 years is, in my opinion, Pacific Rim. Guillermo Del Toro understood precisely why these types of movies had become so popular and beloved, and promptly made a nearly perfect movie in the genre as a love note.
There have now been two additional Godzilla movies since Del Toro's masterclass. The first movie, 2015's 'Godzilla' failed utterly to provide what the teeming masses craved.
2019's 'King Of The Monsters' started dropping trailers some time ago that were filled with nothing but glorious monster porn, and -finally-, the fans were given renewed hope.
Now, only one question remains: Has the King returned for good?
THE SHORT VERSION:
Yeah, but as usual, the humans are the monsters.
THE LONG VERSION:
If 2013's 'Pacific Rim' was a masterclass on how to make a movie in the genre, 2015's 'Godzilla' was exactly the opposite. The only people in any hurry to praise the movie did so based on its merits as 'a character film'. 'King Of The Monsters' is somewhere in between these two, and as with its predecessor, the things that keep it from being a truly stupendous entry in the history of Godzilla films are us. The humans.
I've rabbited on about this before, and shall do so at least once more: There's a tried and true formula to be had where good monster movies are concerned. Give a little history, a little build-up, then give us the monsters. Once the monsters are on-screen, anything NOT monsters should only be a segue to more monsters.
2015's tragedy of a film is notorious for only having around five minutes of actual footage containing Godzilla plying his craft. Admittedly, those are five muscle-flexingly good minutes, but not a second of it makes up for the rest of the film. 'KOTM' spend much more time with monsters on the screen. In this, it is a huge improvement on its predecessor. There are story tie-ins to the very watchable Skull Island from 2017 as well, and a great deal of very palatable world-building as well. The humans are still what cocks the whole thing up though. The movie insists on not only trying to tell a story about something other than the monsters, it's a -BAD- story. There are a few stand-out moments from the actors:
- In a statement that will shock no one, 'Stranger Things' star Millie Bobby Brown continues to prove that she's going to be an absolute tidal wave of force once she grows fully into her skills. Her ability to bring alarmingly adult sentiment to the role of a young person. All of that kind of goes out the window with the way her character is written in the film's third act, but that's not Brown's fault at all.
- Bradley Whitford is delightful in whatever he's doing. Period.
- Ken Watanabe is amazing, and has the only remotely satisfying bit of human story in the entire movie. This is owed to the fact that said story is entirely in service to the monsters.
- Charles Dance is also wasted here, but he's delightful whenever he's on-screen. He reminds me a great deal of Peter Cushing more and more as I watch him. He absolutely owns every scene he's in, and you're sort of left shaking your head going, "He's sort of got a point."
- I know that Vera Farmiga's gotta eat, but damn. She's not on this list because her character was notably good. She's on this list because her character was notably bad. As a matter of fact, she is THE worst part of the film, and responsible for THE worst part of the human story piece. I'm sure the actress is very nice, but the character of Dr. Emma Russell is a bloody moron.
Aside from the humans, the bits with the monsters in them were pretty dang great! A lot of the good-uns make appearances here:
- Godzilla
- Ghidorah
- Mothra
- Rodan
- Muto
There are several other 'Titans' that appear in the film as well. And if you're thinking to yourself, "Wow, this...sounds too much like Spider-Man 3 where there were too many villains and..." you'd be right. None of the monsters gets enough screen time, even when there are monsters on-screen. That's not just because the room is crowded, however.
It's also very poorly lit.
This movie is lit like a damn DC Comics film, and that's all that needs to be said on this subject.
They're getting closer with the Godzilla films. Indeed, 2020's Godzilla vs. Kong has already finished production, and if they continue to learn on the curve they're demonstrating, it should be pretty good. Indeed, the big ape's appearance in Skull Island was plentiful and well-lit, so I have high hopes!
For now, King Of The Monsters gets a solid 'Good Enough For Now.'
Now, go watch Pacific Rim again and remind yourself of what a good giant monster movie should be.
SPOILER-FILLED GRIPES!
- Are you fucking kidding me with this bio-sonar bullshit? Okay, so the monsters all emit that crap, but then they drop the bomb that Ghidorah isn't from Earth, so how does it emit the sonar?
- While we're on the subject of E.T. the Hydra, why are the other monsters acknowledging him as an Alpha if he's not from Earth?! Why aren't they all mobbing his ass and killing him?!
- Anyone else notice that Ghidorah's storm only followed him around when it was cinematically convenient?
- Yes, Charlie Dance's brilliant Colonel leaves the Orca device, THE KEY to controlling the monsters, out in the open, unguarded, after the teenager with a heart of gold has run off in a huff because she disapproves of them pretty much...doing exactly what they said they would. So unguarded that said teenager is then immediately able to steal it and then take enough time to escape their secret base without being detected or any alarms sounding. Fuck off.
- The mother wants to draw Ghidorah away from Godzilla to give him a chance to stand up and get back to badass. Okay, fine, then GET ON THE GODDAMNED OSPREY and don't get into your hummer! Are you seriously trying to tell me that you thought you could get farther on the ground in the middle of a ruined city than you could in the...oh, fuck it, never mind.
- You're telling me that the Orca was designed with the specific audio out jacks required to hook up to a legacy audio system in Boston, eh? Okay then.
- The number of Cinema Sins-esque "They survive this" moments in this film is just off the chain, even for me.
- "Well...wake it up!" Uh, you already know its heart is beating and you just set up a ton of explosives all around it to get its attention. Then the whole complex sort of falls in around it on fire. I think Boo's awake, Charlie. I think he's wide the fuck awake.
- What, precisely IS crush depth for that sub they're in when they go into their hollow Earth passage and discover Atlantis?
- I don't think radiation works the way you think radiation works.
At their core, the 'Golden Age' Toho Godzilla films were a warning against the research and use of nuclear power. The giant lizard was a metaphor for the perils we were courting should such endeavors go wrong. Humanity was the real monster.
As time passed, moves stopped being so direct with their comparisons and started being more about watching a giant monster wreck whatever was unfortunate enough to wind up in the same timezone. And it was good.
The greatest of these giant monster movies that we've seen in the last 20 years is, in my opinion, Pacific Rim. Guillermo Del Toro understood precisely why these types of movies had become so popular and beloved, and promptly made a nearly perfect movie in the genre as a love note.
There have now been two additional Godzilla movies since Del Toro's masterclass. The first movie, 2015's 'Godzilla' failed utterly to provide what the teeming masses craved.
2019's 'King Of The Monsters' started dropping trailers some time ago that were filled with nothing but glorious monster porn, and -finally-, the fans were given renewed hope.
Now, only one question remains: Has the King returned for good?
THE SHORT VERSION:
Yeah, but as usual, the humans are the monsters.
THE LONG VERSION:
If 2013's 'Pacific Rim' was a masterclass on how to make a movie in the genre, 2015's 'Godzilla' was exactly the opposite. The only people in any hurry to praise the movie did so based on its merits as 'a character film'. 'King Of The Monsters' is somewhere in between these two, and as with its predecessor, the things that keep it from being a truly stupendous entry in the history of Godzilla films are us. The humans.
I've rabbited on about this before, and shall do so at least once more: There's a tried and true formula to be had where good monster movies are concerned. Give a little history, a little build-up, then give us the monsters. Once the monsters are on-screen, anything NOT monsters should only be a segue to more monsters.
2015's tragedy of a film is notorious for only having around five minutes of actual footage containing Godzilla plying his craft. Admittedly, those are five muscle-flexingly good minutes, but not a second of it makes up for the rest of the film. 'KOTM' spend much more time with monsters on the screen. In this, it is a huge improvement on its predecessor. There are story tie-ins to the very watchable Skull Island from 2017 as well, and a great deal of very palatable world-building as well. The humans are still what cocks the whole thing up though. The movie insists on not only trying to tell a story about something other than the monsters, it's a -BAD- story. There are a few stand-out moments from the actors:
- In a statement that will shock no one, 'Stranger Things' star Millie Bobby Brown continues to prove that she's going to be an absolute tidal wave of force once she grows fully into her skills. Her ability to bring alarmingly adult sentiment to the role of a young person. All of that kind of goes out the window with the way her character is written in the film's third act, but that's not Brown's fault at all.
- Bradley Whitford is delightful in whatever he's doing. Period.
- Ken Watanabe is amazing, and has the only remotely satisfying bit of human story in the entire movie. This is owed to the fact that said story is entirely in service to the monsters.
- Charles Dance is also wasted here, but he's delightful whenever he's on-screen. He reminds me a great deal of Peter Cushing more and more as I watch him. He absolutely owns every scene he's in, and you're sort of left shaking your head going, "He's sort of got a point."
- I know that Vera Farmiga's gotta eat, but damn. She's not on this list because her character was notably good. She's on this list because her character was notably bad. As a matter of fact, she is THE worst part of the film, and responsible for THE worst part of the human story piece. I'm sure the actress is very nice, but the character of Dr. Emma Russell is a bloody moron.
Aside from the humans, the bits with the monsters in them were pretty dang great! A lot of the good-uns make appearances here:
- Godzilla
- Ghidorah
- Mothra
- Rodan
- Muto
There are several other 'Titans' that appear in the film as well. And if you're thinking to yourself, "Wow, this...sounds too much like Spider-Man 3 where there were too many villains and..." you'd be right. None of the monsters gets enough screen time, even when there are monsters on-screen. That's not just because the room is crowded, however.
It's also very poorly lit.
This movie is lit like a damn DC Comics film, and that's all that needs to be said on this subject.
They're getting closer with the Godzilla films. Indeed, 2020's Godzilla vs. Kong has already finished production, and if they continue to learn on the curve they're demonstrating, it should be pretty good. Indeed, the big ape's appearance in Skull Island was plentiful and well-lit, so I have high hopes!
For now, King Of The Monsters gets a solid 'Good Enough For Now.'
Now, go watch Pacific Rim again and remind yourself of what a good giant monster movie should be.
SPOILER-FILLED GRIPES!
- Are you fucking kidding me with this bio-sonar bullshit? Okay, so the monsters all emit that crap, but then they drop the bomb that Ghidorah isn't from Earth, so how does it emit the sonar?
- While we're on the subject of E.T. the Hydra, why are the other monsters acknowledging him as an Alpha if he's not from Earth?! Why aren't they all mobbing his ass and killing him?!
- Anyone else notice that Ghidorah's storm only followed him around when it was cinematically convenient?
- Yes, Charlie Dance's brilliant Colonel leaves the Orca device, THE KEY to controlling the monsters, out in the open, unguarded, after the teenager with a heart of gold has run off in a huff because she disapproves of them pretty much...doing exactly what they said they would. So unguarded that said teenager is then immediately able to steal it and then take enough time to escape their secret base without being detected or any alarms sounding. Fuck off.
- The mother wants to draw Ghidorah away from Godzilla to give him a chance to stand up and get back to badass. Okay, fine, then GET ON THE GODDAMNED OSPREY and don't get into your hummer! Are you seriously trying to tell me that you thought you could get farther on the ground in the middle of a ruined city than you could in the...oh, fuck it, never mind.
- You're telling me that the Orca was designed with the specific audio out jacks required to hook up to a legacy audio system in Boston, eh? Okay then.
- The number of Cinema Sins-esque "They survive this" moments in this film is just off the chain, even for me.
- "Well...wake it up!" Uh, you already know its heart is beating and you just set up a ton of explosives all around it to get its attention. Then the whole complex sort of falls in around it on fire. I think Boo's awake, Charlie. I think he's wide the fuck awake.
- What, precisely IS crush depth for that sub they're in when they go into their hollow Earth passage and discover Atlantis?
- I don't think radiation works the way you think radiation works.
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