Avengers - Endgame: The Leftovers
(GET UP - Shinedown)
SPOILERS! ALL OF THE SPOILERS HERE.
Seriously, I'm talking about shit that will ruin the movie for you if you haven't seen it. Unless you're completely disinterested in this movie or you've already seen it, run the other way, please. If you want to comment on this, do it HERE within Blogger and not on other Social Media platforms please. Don't ruin this for other people.
Alright. You asked for it. The spoilers start here.
Avengers Endgame is probably the closest thing that Marvel could have made to a perfect movie. It wasn't without its questionable moments, however, and I want to ask some of those questions now, as well as call out some things about the movie that I absolutely lost my shit over:
- LOST IT: The hammer. Pretty much everything with Mjolnir. All of it.
- LOST IT: The Ancient showing back up again and just MAN-HANDLING -- Hulk-handling? -- Banner.
- LOST IT: Pepper Potts finally getting her armor. I've been waiting for Rescue to show up for 10 bloody years now, and after the tease in Iron Man 3, I was ready. My only gripe here is that we got so little of her once the moment finally arrived.
- LOST IT: Pretty much everything about Tony Stark in this movie.
- LOST IT: When the Sling Ring circles started popping up in the third act.
- LOST IT: I'm sorry, but Marvel does Girl Power so much better than DC. There. I said it. You don't really get a feel for just how well they do it until Captain Marvel has to get the Gauntlet to Scott and Hope in the van and all of those bad-ass warrior women show up to clear the road.
- LOST IT: The cheeseburger scene at the end with Happy. WHAT A GRACE NOTE!
- LOST IT: When the original Arc Reactor shows up at the end of the film. The feels!!!
- LOST IT: When Scarlett Witch gets hers.
- LOST IT: I love you 3000. Oh my gosh....
- LOST IT: When Stark calls Thor Lebowski. Because yes.
- QUESTION: The business of time-travel and how you need a Pym particle to do it since you're travelling through the Quantum Realm to do it. I can dig that, but it's clearly established that Scott only has enough Pym particles for each person to make TWO TRIPS, one there and one back. If that's the case, how the hell did Thanos' ENTIRE SHIP make it into present day? Seriously, let's work with that for a second. Yes, Evil Nebula had enough Pym particles to get herself back, but Thanos' ship did not, to say nothing of the thousands of lives on that ship that came through with him.
"But Steve," you cry, "Thanos was an advanced being who understands Time Travel, so he could have just done a thing!" If so, what the hell was he waiting for this whole time? If Thanos had access to time travel, this should all have been over before it started.
- QUESTION: Can we talk about Cap's shield for a moment? Like...where he gets it back from? Maybe I need to watch the movie again to listen to how they're handling time travel and futures becoming pasts, etc. but... yeah. Where the hell did he get his whole PAINTED shield back from?
- QUESTION: Can we....talk about how Steve Rogers elbowed Peggy Carter's husband out of the way in the past to get with Peggy instead? About how he clearly had a thing with her NIECE(?) and sort of opted for the classic model instead? I'm down with most of the time travel skullduggery that took place, but I'm not sure how I feel about this.
- QUESTION: So, the Soul Stone, and the price you have to pay for it. Red Skull makes it sound an awful lot like you need to sacrifice THE most important thing in order to obtain the stone, the thing you love the most. I get Thanos and Gamora, but what is the movie trying to say about Widow and Hawkeye? Is it implying that they really love each other TRULY MADLY DEEPLY? If so, that's sort of a betrayal to Hawkeye's whole family and Nat's confessed feelings for Banner. If that's not it, how the heck did they obtain the Soul Stone?
- QUESTION: Can someone please explain the Banner Hulk to me, please? Hulk and Banner were clearly two very different people, and they both clearly wanted to be in control. The end result of this was...what, Banner getting Hulk's body while retaining his own brains? So where is Hulk?? I mean, a huge piece of Hulk's appeal was the whole mindless ragemonster thing, and I feel like Marvel sort of...pulled the rug out from under him here. Not sure how I feel about this.
- QUESTION: HOW DOES SCOTT GET OUT OF THE QUANTUM REALM??? That got hand-waved so hard!
- QUESTION: Where the FUCK does Valkyrie get her pegasus from?!
- QUESTION: Are we just hand-waving the fact that the original Infinity Gauntlet was built by ancient dwarves to have a better understanding of so much more crap and access to so much more advanced materials than we do here on Earth, and Team Stark just sort of built a new one? Yes, it's cool as shit, but ... really? Stark Ex Machina? No Shuri helping here? We KNOW she survived the Snap.
- QUESTION: There were people handling Infinity stones left and right in this movie without the pyrotechnics on display from Guardians Of The Galaxy. What?!
- QUESTION: Did...anyone else notice Thor's beard going from unkempt to styled to braided at several points in the movie?
- QUESTION: Thor almost single-handedly takes Thanos out in Infinity War because Stormbreaker is such a massively OP weapon, but he very nearly loses the fight to Thanos in this movie. Uh...why?
Some leftover objections and thoughts:
- I'm not sure how I feel about Banner being perma-Hulk'd in this film. Not only is much of his comedy somewhat boorish as the Hulk, but it completely crushes the love story that he and Nat started back during Civil War. There was unresolved tension there during Infinity War, and...what, it just ends now?
- Not a single peep from Vision? Really? SO SAD. I mean, I get it. I get -why- he's not in the film, but damn...
- Anyone else feel like they took a page from The Return Of The King with all of the movie's endings?
- Not nearly enough Nick Fury, but I guess we got to gorge on him in Captain Marvel.
- I'm...not sure how I feel about fat Thor and reducing his suffering to a punch-line. That's the ONE THING I don't think I like Taika Waititi for. There's a lot of Thor that he reduced to a punch-line. Yes, Ragnarok was a FUNNY movie, but the carry-over from that... I dunno.
- RENEE RUSSO. My goodness, that woman just owned her few moments as Friga.
- So...Loki went out quickly in Infinity War, and we get almost NONE OF HIM in Endgame? Really?!?
- I can handle Falcon becoming Cap. This is another very intelligent move that Marvel has taken a lot of time to make properly. He is established as the obvious choice in previous films, just as Bucky is established as the opposite.
- I was frustrated about the lack of Odin when Thor went back in time, but he got his tender moments with Thor during Ragnarok, so it's appropriate that Friga get hers. And my GOODNESS, what a moment.
- If Thor isn't in Guardians 3, I'll be super frustrated. The GOTG crew needs a little USP, and Thor is up to the task, especially in his new Taika form. Though, while we're on this subject...
- Can we talk about the lack of closure with Gamora? Don't get me wrong, I sort of...don't care about her, or Star-Lord, but it was a little odd that he didn't get any closure here.
Okay, seriously, I need to talk about a few VERY spoilery things now. People are getting their ass kicked in other countries for spoiling this type of shit for people, so if you don't want to know, you should have gone away a long time ago.
- I'm...not sure how I feel about Black Widow dying. The choice to kill her rather than Hawkeye was a good one. I think there was more emotional impact with her death, especially after her little talk with Steve Rogers about how she has a purpose now. That said, we -know- a Widow movie is coming, so... what, a prequel?
- For once, the internet was reasonably dead-on. They took Start and Rogers off the table. I wasn't sure they'd have the balls to do that. Stark went out like a bad, bad man though.
I know there'll be other thoughts about this movie that crop up after I've seen it again, but for now, I rest. All of my grips are an aside. This was a phenomenal movie.
SPOILERS! ALL OF THE SPOILERS HERE.
Seriously, I'm talking about shit that will ruin the movie for you if you haven't seen it. Unless you're completely disinterested in this movie or you've already seen it, run the other way, please. If you want to comment on this, do it HERE within Blogger and not on other Social Media platforms please. Don't ruin this for other people.
Alright. You asked for it. The spoilers start here.
Avengers Endgame is probably the closest thing that Marvel could have made to a perfect movie. It wasn't without its questionable moments, however, and I want to ask some of those questions now, as well as call out some things about the movie that I absolutely lost my shit over:
- LOST IT: The hammer. Pretty much everything with Mjolnir. All of it.
- LOST IT: The Ancient showing back up again and just MAN-HANDLING -- Hulk-handling? -- Banner.
- LOST IT: Pepper Potts finally getting her armor. I've been waiting for Rescue to show up for 10 bloody years now, and after the tease in Iron Man 3, I was ready. My only gripe here is that we got so little of her once the moment finally arrived.
- LOST IT: Pretty much everything about Tony Stark in this movie.
- LOST IT: When the Sling Ring circles started popping up in the third act.
- LOST IT: I'm sorry, but Marvel does Girl Power so much better than DC. There. I said it. You don't really get a feel for just how well they do it until Captain Marvel has to get the Gauntlet to Scott and Hope in the van and all of those bad-ass warrior women show up to clear the road.
- LOST IT: The cheeseburger scene at the end with Happy. WHAT A GRACE NOTE!
- LOST IT: When the original Arc Reactor shows up at the end of the film. The feels!!!
- LOST IT: When Scarlett Witch gets hers.
- LOST IT: I love you 3000. Oh my gosh....
- LOST IT: When Stark calls Thor Lebowski. Because yes.
- QUESTION: The business of time-travel and how you need a Pym particle to do it since you're travelling through the Quantum Realm to do it. I can dig that, but it's clearly established that Scott only has enough Pym particles for each person to make TWO TRIPS, one there and one back. If that's the case, how the hell did Thanos' ENTIRE SHIP make it into present day? Seriously, let's work with that for a second. Yes, Evil Nebula had enough Pym particles to get herself back, but Thanos' ship did not, to say nothing of the thousands of lives on that ship that came through with him.
"But Steve," you cry, "Thanos was an advanced being who understands Time Travel, so he could have just done a thing!" If so, what the hell was he waiting for this whole time? If Thanos had access to time travel, this should all have been over before it started.
- QUESTION: Can we talk about Cap's shield for a moment? Like...where he gets it back from? Maybe I need to watch the movie again to listen to how they're handling time travel and futures becoming pasts, etc. but... yeah. Where the hell did he get his whole PAINTED shield back from?
- QUESTION: Can we....talk about how Steve Rogers elbowed Peggy Carter's husband out of the way in the past to get with Peggy instead? About how he clearly had a thing with her NIECE(?) and sort of opted for the classic model instead? I'm down with most of the time travel skullduggery that took place, but I'm not sure how I feel about this.
- QUESTION: So, the Soul Stone, and the price you have to pay for it. Red Skull makes it sound an awful lot like you need to sacrifice THE most important thing in order to obtain the stone, the thing you love the most. I get Thanos and Gamora, but what is the movie trying to say about Widow and Hawkeye? Is it implying that they really love each other TRULY MADLY DEEPLY? If so, that's sort of a betrayal to Hawkeye's whole family and Nat's confessed feelings for Banner. If that's not it, how the heck did they obtain the Soul Stone?
- QUESTION: Can someone please explain the Banner Hulk to me, please? Hulk and Banner were clearly two very different people, and they both clearly wanted to be in control. The end result of this was...what, Banner getting Hulk's body while retaining his own brains? So where is Hulk?? I mean, a huge piece of Hulk's appeal was the whole mindless ragemonster thing, and I feel like Marvel sort of...pulled the rug out from under him here. Not sure how I feel about this.
- QUESTION: HOW DOES SCOTT GET OUT OF THE QUANTUM REALM??? That got hand-waved so hard!
- QUESTION: Where the FUCK does Valkyrie get her pegasus from?!
- QUESTION: Are we just hand-waving the fact that the original Infinity Gauntlet was built by ancient dwarves to have a better understanding of so much more crap and access to so much more advanced materials than we do here on Earth, and Team Stark just sort of built a new one? Yes, it's cool as shit, but ... really? Stark Ex Machina? No Shuri helping here? We KNOW she survived the Snap.
- QUESTION: There were people handling Infinity stones left and right in this movie without the pyrotechnics on display from Guardians Of The Galaxy. What?!
- QUESTION: Did...anyone else notice Thor's beard going from unkempt to styled to braided at several points in the movie?
- QUESTION: Thor almost single-handedly takes Thanos out in Infinity War because Stormbreaker is such a massively OP weapon, but he very nearly loses the fight to Thanos in this movie. Uh...why?
Some leftover objections and thoughts:
- I'm not sure how I feel about Banner being perma-Hulk'd in this film. Not only is much of his comedy somewhat boorish as the Hulk, but it completely crushes the love story that he and Nat started back during Civil War. There was unresolved tension there during Infinity War, and...what, it just ends now?
- Not a single peep from Vision? Really? SO SAD. I mean, I get it. I get -why- he's not in the film, but damn...
- Anyone else feel like they took a page from The Return Of The King with all of the movie's endings?
- Not nearly enough Nick Fury, but I guess we got to gorge on him in Captain Marvel.
- I'm...not sure how I feel about fat Thor and reducing his suffering to a punch-line. That's the ONE THING I don't think I like Taika Waititi for. There's a lot of Thor that he reduced to a punch-line. Yes, Ragnarok was a FUNNY movie, but the carry-over from that... I dunno.
- RENEE RUSSO. My goodness, that woman just owned her few moments as Friga.
- So...Loki went out quickly in Infinity War, and we get almost NONE OF HIM in Endgame? Really?!?
- I can handle Falcon becoming Cap. This is another very intelligent move that Marvel has taken a lot of time to make properly. He is established as the obvious choice in previous films, just as Bucky is established as the opposite.
- I was frustrated about the lack of Odin when Thor went back in time, but he got his tender moments with Thor during Ragnarok, so it's appropriate that Friga get hers. And my GOODNESS, what a moment.
- If Thor isn't in Guardians 3, I'll be super frustrated. The GOTG crew needs a little USP, and Thor is up to the task, especially in his new Taika form. Though, while we're on this subject...
- Can we talk about the lack of closure with Gamora? Don't get me wrong, I sort of...don't care about her, or Star-Lord, but it was a little odd that he didn't get any closure here.
Okay, seriously, I need to talk about a few VERY spoilery things now. People are getting their ass kicked in other countries for spoiling this type of shit for people, so if you don't want to know, you should have gone away a long time ago.
- I'm...not sure how I feel about Black Widow dying. The choice to kill her rather than Hawkeye was a good one. I think there was more emotional impact with her death, especially after her little talk with Steve Rogers about how she has a purpose now. That said, we -know- a Widow movie is coming, so... what, a prequel?
- For once, the internet was reasonably dead-on. They took Start and Rogers off the table. I wasn't sure they'd have the balls to do that. Stark went out like a bad, bad man though.
I know there'll be other thoughts about this movie that crop up after I've seen it again, but for now, I rest. All of my grips are an aside. This was a phenomenal movie.
You didn't LOSE IT when Steve started dropping the Hammer? It's like I don't know you.
ReplyDeleteThe Soul Stone requires a sacrifice, a "soul for a soul". Not sure it has to he the most important person to qualify.
Banner reconciled with Hulk, forming a gestalt being called "Professor Hulk" in the comics. Cruder than the uptight Banner, more in control than Hulk.
Scott got out of the Quantum realm when a rat pushed the button. Because fuck Ant Man.
Everyone handling an Infinity Stone had a glove on. Past movies show that's safe.
Thor did a thing right before the fight that groomed his beard.
Endgame Thor was an emotional wreck. They had to nerf him to keep the roflstomping everyone.
That's all I got.
Hey man, the bit with the Hammer was covered in my first LOST it mention. ;)
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