- Bathroom Musings -

<REM> This one never made it over to Facebook.  It was originally listed as a 'One-Off' in my old Blog over on TypePad.  I rescued it from the archives and published it here, for posterity.  Or maybe that's posteriority.  I've heard it both ways...

Anyway, enjoy.  And if you don't know what anal beads are, go ask your parents, but be damn sure you have your phone on VERY RECORD, because that's the kind of material that YouTube was invented for. </REM>   

There are very few things that can halt the march of a good poop when it's time to go.  Most of the time, you have to get where you need to go, set up roost, and hang on for the ride.  This is not to say that I've never been taken so aback by something that the oncoming storm was put on hold, mind you.  Just yesterday, I got up from watching Sam and Kim play Arkham Origins and rushed into the bathroom on the main level of my house.  I lifted the lid, and BAM, the urge to poop was curtailed.

Me: "Uh...guys?  Why are there anal beads in my toilet?"
Sam: "...What?!"
Me: "There are ANAL BEADS in my toilet!"
Kim: "They aren't actually anal beads, idiot."
Me: "While I am reassured by the fact that no member of my house would actually leave this type of thing in my toilet, it does beg the question, "What the hell is in my toilet, and why does it look like anal beads?!"
Kim: "They're toilet bowl cleaners!  It helps keep the bowl clean."
Me: "...Who the hell designs toilet bowl cleaners that look like anal beads?!"